Commentary on a Blessed Life

A Little Update

Ryan turned three months old on Friday and I cannot believe my little is getting so big. We go for his check-up this week but if I had to guess I would say he is around 15 pounds. He is currently wearing 3-6 month clothing and eating about 6 ounces of formal/milk every 2-3 hours. The boy likes to eat. Of all of my children, he enjoys breast feeding the least. He is not a great latcher and gets distracted very easily. I know it is what is is, so I am continuing to nurse. My long term goal is to breast feed for a year, but I am hoping to make it six months in all honesty. I am okay with whatever happens. Currently, I am pumping twice a day at work which might be my most frustrating annoyance. I only get enough for about one and a half bottles and sometimes not even that but it takes a lot of time, energy and scheduling to get the pumping sessions in. Again, there is nothing I can really do about it, so it is what it is.

Ryan is really pure joy. I absolutely love having him a part of our family and Megan and Tyler love him so much too! I honestly love being a mother and would have three more if I was so old and poor. HA! His smile is infectious and he is generally happy about 90% of the time.

I will leave you with three pictures from the last three months.




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It happened in an Instant

Well, it happened, my first little teensy tiny baby turned five this weekend. I am both stunned and over the top excited for what this little bundle of joy’s future hold. She is one in a million. She can light up a room in one smile and her laugher is contagious. I will always be forever grateful to Megan for making me a mother. After of years of trying I had really lost hope that this would ever happen…and here we are, five years later, still celebrating this precious gift to us and the world.
Happy birthday, mega-million, we love you so!








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Back to School

I know I said I was going away for a while, but yesterday I was searching through past posts to look at Megan from last year and I just couldn’t help but be thrilled to see that I have so much of the last two years documented in this blog. I have to realize that this blog is not something I have to do but something that I WANT to do to keep and preserve family memories.
So yesterday and today this happened…

Yes, I now have two children in school. Part-time school, but still school. This is Megan’s second and final year at POP school before she moves on to full day Kindergarten at St. Columban School next fall. I am both happy and sad about this. I know it is so cliché, but where does the time go? It feels like just yesterday she was Ryan’s size and I was so stressed out as a new mother going back to work. She was such a blessing in my life and still is. I am proud that she is so kind, and compassionate. She cares for others deeply and I hope she always wants to make the world a better place to live in.

And Tyler, he has grown up so much too. When I look at him, he is still my baby, but I know with each passing day he is becoming more independent. He had a good day today. A few tears in the beginning, but that was expected. He is such a tough little guy but sensitive at the same time. We sometimes refer to him as Jeckle and Hyde. He is as sweet as can be and loves to cuddle up with anyone who has a willing lap for him to sit on…but, when he is hungry or tied, watch out! He gets this crazy look and stars to yell and act terrible. I guess that is part of the growing process.
I will take the good and the bad with all of my kids. No one is perfect, and I am beginning to realize each of their limitations and work to make them feel good and loved and appreciated no matter what they are doing.
As for school, I think they are going to have an awesome year. I am looking forward to seeing Tyler socialize more and become more independent. He already loves playing t-ball and running around, it will be nice to see him sit still for a while and listen to instruction that way.
For Megan, I think this might be a major breakthrough academic year for her. She is like a little sponge and I know she is excited to learn new things. They went on a scavenger hunt today and she was so excited about it. Her teacher already sent home a paper to help us work on pencil grip. I know she will love being able to write.




Now we are off to tennis and then back home for a little walk around the neighborhood.

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I just don’t feel like blogging much anymore,
I have a lot going on and a lot to say but I have no motivation to use this space anymore.
Maybe I will feel differently in a few weeks or months or something.
It’s weird because for a while I loved being here and writing here even though I know not many people read this.
It was (is) a nice space for me.
Like I said, maybe I will be back.
Maybe not.

Until then, count your blessings.


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Long Time

I didn’t plan on taking a few weeks off intentionally. And I am not going to use the excuse that having Ryan makes it to difficult to blog. I just have chosen it to make time for blogging and that is okay because this is my blog and I can do what I want. So there’s that.

Things have been quickly moving here. We enjoyed our last weeks of summer, took a fantastic vacation to Myrtle Beach, SC and I started back to work last week. We are adjusting pretty well. I always have said that I didn’t want to be a stay at home mom. I love my job and I enjoy getting out for the nine months I am in school each year. But, man, I miss being here when I am gone. I miss slow mornings and loving on my kids and just being present for each moment in their lives. Know time is fleeting and I hate missing anything.

Ryan is getting so big and Megan and Tyler are turning out to be wonderful big siblings to him. They will love him to death if we are not careful!


20140824-090359.jpgLittle Mommy
All in all, life is good and busy and crazy and happy. I do really love my life and I need to stop and count my blessings more often.

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Sweat Once a Day

Does anyone out there read Emily’s blog? She is an amazing woman…running 50 milers on the weekend…FOR FUN! I love reading her blog because she is not only inspirational, but she seems so down to earth even though she does things that most people could never do. It is one of my favorite blogs even though we have nothing in common and we live worlds away from one another. I guess that is the magic of blog reading, you can live vicariously through people and their words and pictures.

Anyway, Emily has inspired me to, well, “Sweat Once a Day” in August. I may not have the time, energy, or endurance to run like she does, but I can certainly make it is a goal for August to participate in something physical every day this month. I want to get back into exercising, but I feel really out of shape and just generally “blah.” So getting physical everyday is going to a challenge for me but also an opportunity to feel better about myself plus also take some much deserved me time even if I am pushing a stroller in the process.

20140803-111254.jpg My view during a sweat session on Friday

So, no elaborate goals for me at this point…I can sweat for 5 minutes or 90 minutes, it doesn’t matter. As long as I am doing something that requires movement and getting myself out there and exerting enough energy to break a sweat I will be happy. I am going to track my sweat via calendar on my phone and the SparkPeople app. I started tracking food as well, but that is kind of a joke since I am breast feeding and my appetite is cray cray. Maybe I will post a weekly update on this blog too…but, who am I kidding? That probably won’t happen!

But here is what has happened so far:
August 1: 60 minute stroller walk in the neighborhood (the double stroller is a work-out in itself!)
August 2: 35 minute Elliptical Trainer and 10 minute bike at the gym (it felt great to be at the gym, ALONE, and bonus I was still able to see swim lessons down below).

What kind of workouts is everyone doing?

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Happenings in List Form

Here is what is what is happening in my life today (in list form, of course):

1. Dunkin Donuts coffee: I love it when I go to a DD store, but the home version leaves something to be desired. I hate that I leaves a film on my coffee cup and pot…can we say, unappetizing????


2. Triathlon: my dear friend, Meredith Brooke Keeran Kessler, is a bad-ass. Check her Out! I saw her race for the first time to weekend and am in total awe. She rocks.


3. Tyler’s Addiction: speaking of coffee, Tyler loves it! The only way I can get him to sit still for breakfast after church is by giving him a cup of decaf coffee. Now he requests it at home…don’t judge.


4. Insatiable Appetite: I am starving all the time. Legit. Breast feeding has made me a hungry beast and, unfortunately, I don’t have a great metabolism so when I eat a ton I gain weight…so I am trying to curb the cravings with a ton of veggies and grains.


5. Dancing Queen: Megan’s dance pictures came in today. They are gorgeous. I was thinking about ending her dance career this year but now I have the dancing bug again. I can’t shake it…I love tap dancing!


6. Spirituality: I have been really examining my spirituality and faith life quite a bit lately. I don’t know if it is having a child or getting older or what, but it has sort of rocked me a bit. Our God is a good and loving God, I truly believe that. I am made perfectly imperfect and sometimes that is hard to swallow. I have a lot of shortcomings and I have had heartache in my life, but I believe God surrounds my life and I need to focus my energy on that.


7. Baby Fever: I can see why Michelle Duggar has so many children. Babies are just so unbelievably awesome. Even with all the poop and lack of sleep and high maintenance of it all, I would have another one in a heartbeat.


8. Sleepovers: we had the neighborhood girls over for a sleepover on Friday night. Many people thought I was crazy, I thought it was so much fun.


9. Swimming Lessons: Both kids are taking swim lessons on Saturday morning. Megan swims like a fish and loves the lessons, Tyler not so much…but he was so much better this week than last week. All I ask for is progress and he delivered.



10. A Free Night: the big kids are at my sister-in-laws house for a sleepover, Shawn is at work and Ryan and I are chilling. The house is freakishly quiet. I thought I would like it, but it is kind of lonely.


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My Girl

I realized that I have not posted a picture of Megan in a few days. It is not because I love her any less than the boys, it is because she is way to busy with friends to hang out with us anymore. When did my four year old turn into a teenager? She is all over the neighborhood with the cutest group of little girls. They are planning picnics, and swimming, and sleep overs and then she comes back to report to us. I hope she always has these girls in her life.

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One Month After Baby

Last summer I started to really make fitness a priority in my life. I committed to my gym and was a regular there, sometimes twice a day. I developed some short term and long term fitness goals for myself and was moving in the right direction, a direction that I had not been able to focus on for many years.

When I found out I was pregnant in early October I decided that this pregnancy would be different then the prior two. I really wanted to be in great shape when I delivered the baby. I stayed very committed to exercise and eating right. Through the first trimester I was even continuing two a day workouts. I felt fabulous (well, besides morning sickness). Up until the end of March, around my 27th week, I was feeling amazing. I even entered (and won!) Caitlin’s “Ironman March” challenge. Even though I was pregnant I felt like I was in the best shape I had been in for as long as I can remember.

Entering trimester three was really when my energy was zapped. I am not sure if it was because I was carrying an XL baby, or tons of extra fluid, or maybe it was just the stress of the end of the school year, but my fitness came to a screeching halt. I was just super tired and really did not have the energy t make it thought the day let alone head to the gym for a workout.

Now, about 4 months later, I am feeling like it is time to get back to getting to it. I am four weeks post pardum and I feel pretty much healed and am gaining energy daily. I had a relatively easy delivery with Ryan and I am attributing a lot of it to being in good shape. I had a ton of energy during the birth and felt super strong while pushing. I had very little tearing compared to the level 4 tears I had with Tyler. I am not ready to start any crazy exercise program until I see the doctor in two weeks, but slowly but surely I have been walking in my neighborhood, on the trails around my house, and I even went to the gym a couple of times.

One thing that has returned with a vengeance that I am not happy with is my appetite. I am starving ALL THE TIME!!!! I know breast feeding has a lot to do with it, but I have no self control. None. So, today I headed to Kroger and stocked up on some really healthy choices of foods and I am hoping to try and track my calories, not necessarily to diet, but to keep myself accountable to something. I simply cannot keep snacking all day long and feel good about myself.

It is not just that I want to be healthy and lose weight but I have to be healthy and lose weight…not just for myself but for my family. I not only want to be a great example to my kids but I want to be able to run with them and go on rides with them and be there for them.

I am going to try and commit to well day by day week by week. I will keep the blog posted with update son my progress. Like I said, nothing crazy because, after all, I did just have a baby. But, little by little I am going to be making big changes in my health and fitness over the next year.

Two pictures before I go, one crop, the morning before I gave birth and the other a week later. I love looking a these because I never realized my belly was so big!!!!

BEFORE(inside baby):
AFER(outside baby):


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Oh, Life

First off, shout out to my BFF for birthing the most beautiful baby boy yesterday. July 20 was a good day.

Now, let’s talk about the trenches…like, stuff is getting real around here. I have three kids and two hands and I am feeling a little like I could freak out a any moment. Alas, I know I am doing my best and this is certainly not a pity party because I could not be happier with my current situation, but I would be lying if I said it wasn’t difficult and sometimes too demanding. Here’s hoping it will get easier as the days progress, but I am not holding my breath.

I need to be more patient with my bigger kids. I have to remind myself that they are still little and I can’t expect them to act any other way than what a three and four year old would act. They are precious and curious and I do not want to be responsible for killing their spirits. However, I would love it if they just listened even 50% of the time. At the same time would be even better.

For instance this morning was a small victory as I toted all three to Kroger with me. It was a perfect shopping trip until Ryan had enough and was crying, Megan started crying for no reason (do 4 year old girls already have hormone issues?), and this happened…

20140721-113136.jpgMy precious toe-head walked right into the corner of my trunk as I was closing it. That was a Mom of the Year” moment. Emergency room avoided…he is fine.

20140721-113330.jpgBy the way, Tyler also vomited in our bed last night…good times!

I guess what I am trying to say is that I look like I may have it together but I definitely don’t have it together…not by any means. Raising healthy, (relatively) happy kids is a challenge even on our best days. Keeping them clean and fed is sometimes all you can do in a day. Super mom I am not…not even close.

In great news…we survived month #1. Yay for Ryan Robert, we love him so.


I will be back later today or tomorrow to talk about how things are going one month in.
For now, make it a good one?,

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