One

I couldn’t let the day end without a shout out to the sweetest baby in the whole wide world!

Ryan, words will never be able to adequately express how much I love you.

   
       

Days Interrupted

a strange fever/slight illness/kind of a stomach flu is passing though our home. I have not had it, but everyone else has.  It’s latest victim is Megan…

  
She is missing a play date this morning and the sad look on her face about killed me.  Hence, I let her have the iPad because, tears.

Summer so far has been everything I have wanted it to be.  Lazy mornings, days at the pool, Kings Island, and later bed times.  It has been glorious.

  
We are pool people.  It is our happy place and has been the thing I loved most about summer since I was a kid.  I am planning on doing some swim lessons soon because everyone could use it. Megan is advanced enough this year to go off the diving board, down the slides, and climb the rock wall. She is an official big girl. Tyler is so much more comfortable in the pool then he was last summer. And Ryan is just a joy all the time.

I do love summer.

Oh, and this happened… 

 

We Made It

I’m on vacation!!!!!!!!!

Back in September I thought this day was so far off and in a blink here we are!  Words cannot begin to express how happy I am to be off for a few months.  I love my job and teaching is my calling in life…but, BUT, I love summer vacation.

I am ready for slow mornings, gym time, fun time, and just a whole lot of spending time with my family and friends.

There is so much good stuff to be happy with!  Ryan is 11 months old (my goodness this year flew by), Megan starts kindergarten in the fall, and Tyler is a crazy maniac.  Life is so so good!

   
   

Feeling Blah

have you ever just felt, well, blah? Like nothing is really exceptionally bad but nothing is exceptionally good either?  This is a strange spot to be in. I have so many personal things going on right now but oh so much to be happy about.  It is a strange place to be standing in. 

I have decided to make this the “Summer of Positivity.” And I am hoping that being positive and happy with life will bring me out of this blah phase.  I think I will start today. 

Three things I am feeling really positive about:

1.  School’s out! Two more in-service days and I am free for the next three months!

2. My kids are cute and relatively well behaved.

3. Turkey sandwiches with Colby jack cheese.  I really love those! 

  

  

  

 I have no idea who took these pictures or when they were taken.  Hahahahahahahahaha! 

The Struggle is Real

Dieting is torture.

It is pure and utter bullshit.

And to think I have to do this for the rest of my life is enough to push me right over the edge.

You can sugar-coat dieting by saying it is a “lifestyle change” or you are “developing healthy habits” or you are trying to eat “Whole foods” but any way you put it, for me, it is a diet.

A diet I will be on until the day that I die.

You see, I don’t crave salads or beets or granola or whole wheat or eating light or Greek yogurt.

I enjoy eating in bulk and ice cream and fried foods and Chinese and snacks and cookies and ALL THE JUNK ALL THE TIME.

I think part of the issue I am having with losing weight this time is I just do not want to have to do it.  I don’t want to give up all of those things that I truly enjoy.  I know, nothing tastes as good as thin feels…but in the moment, the food does taste REALLY GOOD and the guilt I feel isn’t THAT BAD and I can justify and justify and justify my way up the scale.

You lose and gain weight one bite at a time.

I can have a really good day and eat well and exercise…but one slip can send me into a downward spiral that might take me days or even weeks to pick myself back up and get on the diet-train again.

Maybe I am complaining a bit.  Maybe I am a “Debbie Downer.”

But this is life.  This is my reality.

And it sucks.

Life

Oh life.

It is such a drag sometimes.

I feel like most teacher’s feel the same way in May…it is like complete limbo-land…you have so much to do to finish the end of the year but all you want is to start summer break already.  

UGH, I hate it.

My project lists are great but my desire to just hang out in the sunshine and be a mom is greater.  I am not complaining, just stating a fact.

  

 Things have been status quo for the last few weeks. Nothing exciting or blog-worthy.  Ryan turned 10 months and will soon be 11 months and dare I say that I am having a little bit of baby-fever???  I miss my little bitty boo and I keep thinking that maybe, just maybe there may be room in our family for one more…then I shake myself awake and remember that I am barely keeping up with the kids I have and I am just starting to ever so carefully (in a hushed tone) sleep through the night again…but then BABIES!!!!  I love BABIES!!!!  I guess I will leave that one in the hands of God for now (and forever, really).  

I am getting truly pumped for the summer and relaxing a little bit.   I happen to love not having to rush out the door every morning for work. 

On the fitness and dieting front…I am feeling like I am finally getting my groove back (Stella, ha!) after a few months of slacking a bit.  I have been tracking my food and moving my buns and I seem to be on the (slow) track down the scale…again.  I really need to get myself in better shape because I will be spending the majority of the summer in a bathing suit or strapped to a rollercoaster. 

I also have been making the most delicious grilled and healthy dinners.  Tonight we are having Mexican Chicken that is heavy on the veggies and light on the cheese.  I love it and the kids love it so it is a win!

  

maybe a new segment – looks disgusting, tastes delicious

A Day for Us

Megan’s Mothers Day Tea was this morning and it was completely bittersweet. My girl is growing up and this is the beginning of the end of her toddler years. She will be starting kindergarten in the fall and will officially be one of the big kids.

in front if the picture of mommy she made


My first baby is no longer a baby and as I am moving into this new phase of motherhood I cannot help but smile through some tears. Life does move so quickly and I can’t wrap my head   around what a sweet, lovely, caring, sensitive, kind little lady she is. I am forever blessed with her.  
  
I am beyond lucky to have this time with Megan. I was so proud of her today. Being her mom is one of my greatest accomplishments in life.